All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.
Mark Twain
There are two motives for reading a book; one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it.
Bertrand Russell
Always acknowledge a fault frankly. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
Mark Twain
No intelligent idea can gain general acceptance unless some stupidity is mixed in with it.
Fernando Pessoa
Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.
Terry Pratchett
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
Groucho Marx
My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
Mark Twain
One should always play fairly... when one has the winning cards.
Oscar Wilde
An original idea. That can`t be too hard. The library must be full of them.
Stephen Fry
No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
Dave Barry