Funny Quotes
Slang is a language that rolls up its sleeves, spits on its hands and goes to work.
I`m fed up with democracy. In a democracy, people vote for the mayors. I wanted to build a city where I will choose the citizens.
I`m naturally an extremely lazy person, so if someone did everything for me, I really think I would do nothing at all.
Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I`d rather lie around. No contest.
Once when I was lost, I saw a policeman, and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him, "Do you think we`ll ever find them?" He said, "I don`t know kid. There are so many places they can hide."
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
I have great faith in fools - self-confidence my friends will call it.
It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that it is more difficult to be witty every day than to say pretty things from time to time.
When I was young, I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people.
All marriages are happy. It`s the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.